tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post7863829449404052012..comments2024-03-28T21:11:46.849-07:00Comments on Perfume Project NW: LOOK ME IN THE EYE AND TELL ME MY PERFUME STINKS: or WHY CAN’T PEOPLE TALK TO EACH OTHER DIRECTLY?Doc Ellyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08376377441504529063noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post-89518997762067256232018-09-10T10:56:11.852-07:002018-09-10T10:56:11.852-07:00I personally have had many experiences where a wel...I personally have had many experiences where a well-meaning request of not being offensive (one example: please do not smoke on the stairs of our apartment building, it is against the law and enters my living room, thus choking me) and been told off flippantly, being accused of "rudeness"! Some people will simply ignore or tell off those who ask nicely to their face these types of things, which could be leading people to take to anonymous routes that would leave no room for that type of disrespect. The lack of civility doesn't only come from the asker's end.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post-51644758020798639672018-05-23T20:27:15.060-07:002018-05-23T20:27:15.060-07:00Claire, I agree with everything you say. Life woul...Claire, I agree with everything you say. Life would be so much easier if people could actually talk to each other. Ellenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17617147322518152988noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post-36539766312268521152018-05-20T16:56:21.412-07:002018-05-20T16:56:21.412-07:00Gosh, yes. Brave new world. I like to think there ...Gosh, yes. Brave new world. I like to think there are still plenty of people out there who don't live 24/7 on their smartphones, but for the many who do, the ability to initiate real-life person-to-person contact seems to have become atrophied. (I guess I sound like an old fogey...I'm just barely old enough to remember a time when strangers together in a public space would occasionally actually speak to one another). Anyway, it's definitely maddening to find people have "gone over your head" or otherwise sought 3rd party mediation of a dispute they have with you. It makes me think, "Gosh, do they think I am some kind of ogre? Or am I not even worth their time?" So dehumanizing...and don't get me started on "fragrance-free" workplaces. LOL<br /><br /><br /><br /><br /><br />Clairehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02708497794327398043noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post-47295219640604996322018-05-16T10:03:50.674-07:002018-05-16T10:03:50.674-07:00Triniti, I have seen this, too, especially in food...Triniti, I have seen this, too, especially in food service. I don't know why people feel like they can't complain about anything if it is obviously unsatisfactory. Ellenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17617147322518152988noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post-46214818542349785732018-05-16T10:00:56.681-07:002018-05-16T10:00:56.681-07:00Nelle, I think any situation, be it perfume, body ...Nelle, I think any situation, be it perfume, body odor, food odors, or something else, should be dealt with one-on-one, not indirectly. That is the friendly way to solve problems. Ellenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17617147322518152988noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post-79547897255210068922018-05-16T09:59:30.153-07:002018-05-16T09:59:30.153-07:00Martin, it sounds like you offer wonderful custome...Martin, it sounds like you offer wonderful customer service. It's too bad some people don't appreciate it. Good for you!Ellenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17617147322518152988noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post-68713023568152602012018-05-14T18:54:18.354-07:002018-05-14T18:54:18.354-07:00I have coworkers who have had what they consider b...I have coworkers who have had what they consider bad experiences at restaurants and refused to communicate this to their servers during the meal. They would rather complain to the manager after the fact or write a scathing review on Yelp instead of trying to resolve the problem with the server at the time. It’s definitely a lack of interpersonal skills and not knowing how to communicate properly. They still feel entitled to complain about it though.Trinitihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14581910256109599087noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post-40385499010014524522018-05-14T16:15:11.671-07:002018-05-14T16:15:11.671-07:00It does seem kind of cowardly to go above a cowork...It does seem kind of cowardly to go above a coworkers head and basically lounge a complipant about their perfume, instead of talking to them about it, now if its a body odor situation,I can see talking to HR or the supervisor, because you do not want to offend the person. But people today do seem to have a lack of interpersonal skills and empathy partly do to social media and not interacting face to face with real people. Talking to someone politely and explaining why their fragrance may bother you is fine.nelle25https://www.blogger.com/profile/09549813753578479630noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post-65025248737067575362018-05-14T13:02:38.173-07:002018-05-14T13:02:38.173-07:00Working in retail there are many a day that I expe...Working in retail there are many a day that I experience a customer wishing to do a return while having a full conversation on their phone. They expect my service to be done without thought or gesture. And sometimes they actually complain about me - saying I was rude speaking loudly to them.<br />I think, for many, this has become a concentrated self-centered society with people not caring for others but where we all must conform to the choice of five auto paint colors and wear our blue jeans and leggings. Don’t look different and don’t wear a classic 1980’s powerhouse fragrance least you offend someone.<br />Well thank goodness I still walk to the beat of my old drum. I still have only a flip phone and that is because phone booths don’t exist anymore. I don’t text. I have long phone conversations and email. And while working retail, I enjoy the eye-to-eye contact and making a person laugh or smile before they leave the counter. I wish more people were like me because I would tell you , as I have, if the Patchouli you have soaked in is leaving a 8-foot trail or you have a black sesame seed in your teeth.<br />Martinnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post-55582602136266922202018-05-14T11:19:55.252-07:002018-05-14T11:19:55.252-07:00Anne, unfortunately the trend is only going to get...Anne, unfortunately the trend is only going to get worse barring some natural catastrophe that makes people disconnect from their proxies and communicate with each other directly. Ellenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17617147322518152988noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post-89320700940788357682018-05-14T11:13:03.255-07:002018-05-14T11:13:03.255-07:00Azar, yes, the disconnect from the real world is i...Azar, yes, the disconnect from the real world is indeed the biggest contributing cause to lack of interpersonal skills (and life skills in general). Ellenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17617147322518152988noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post-72619887543915864972018-05-14T09:05:07.256-07:002018-05-14T09:05:07.256-07:00I agree that an increased reliance on relatively a...I agree that an increased reliance on relatively anonymous social media leads to a rise in incivility and sense of entitlement. People don’t know how to communicate with each other and learn how to compromise to get along. Using an intermediary (technology or an HR person) to resolve issues encourages a lack of empathy. Unfortunately, I don’t see this trend changing any time soon.Annehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07623791731645199635noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5453792360015486892.post-940836950669207562018-05-14T06:36:54.510-07:002018-05-14T06:36:54.510-07:00What appears to be a trend toward “anonymous conf...What appears to be a trend toward “anonymous confrontation” might be symptomatic of a real lack of simple interpersonal skills and a knowledge of basic etiquette. It must be difficult for people to be comfortable interacting in the real world when their lives are lived in virtual reality.Azarhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08011756547431804355noreply@blogger.com